Dwelling [Speaker Night] on Relationships: What is Love?
A huge thank you to our two speakers, and our thirty odd guests, who joined us for the very first Dwelling session of 2014!
For those who missed the chance to be there, here is a quick recap - in three highlights - just for you:
Highlight of the evening #1:
Watching as Lin Tan dramatically brandished an invisible checklist of expectations against Julia, Cherie and other unsuspecting guests, deciding whether or not these mock-lovers were "to keep" or "to throw out."Lin's philosophy is that love cannot work if you base it on a checklist of expectations your partner must fulfill. She shared about her journey to marriage, and how finding that Mr Right (although the zesty lady might balk at that word choice!) was a process of allowing herself to be open, to let go of those checklists, and to allow love to show up in whatever form it takes. With her carpe diem, seize-the-day attitude, Lin shared: "Throw yourself in. Love is an experience, and any experience worth having shouldn't be lived in your head, but out there."
Highlight of the evening #2:
Listening to Steve, our second speaker, run through his relationship hits and misses, and hearing how his initial mistakes gave him a deeper understanding of who he is (and is not), and what he wants (or does not want) in a relationship. Steve demonstrates, with his own life, what is possible when a couple decides intentionally to keep communications open and to commit to each other in a healthy way. If asked for advice, he might possibly tell you what works for him: committing to his partner that they will talk through any relationship problems with each other before going to sleep each day.
Highlight of the evening #3:
A heartfelt share by participant Lily, in response to a question opened to the floor, namely: how does one keep the romance in a marriage, even after 5 or 10 years?
Lily: I do it by remembering the first time falling in love with him. When I remember the best moments— such as losing a book along a busy London street and having him take the trouble to find it again for me— that sweetness naturally comes back. Awwww.